Reparenting Yourself = Psychological Self-love Reconditioning
Updated: Aug 24, 2020
Your mind has the incredible ability to, consciously or not, adjust and relate the body to its social environment. You've been doing this since you were brought into this life. Along your journey, your parents words have become your inner voice. To explore this truth on the deepest levels, your parents words not only became your inner voice, their actions oftentimes became your actions, as you were the product of your environment, and still are in many ways. Without this awareness and the conscious choice to break destructive generational patterns, this path will continue. This is why, as a collective, we are looking inward to heal the generational repression and wounds, so that we can evolve as a species. Now is the time to change any unhealthy patterns, for yourself, and those who follow in your footsteps...
As a spiritual and wellbeing guide, I invite you to take a slow, deep breath, have a seat, and sit with this inner voice for a moment, if you can reflect safely (staying regulated without having a flashback or being triggered, if your childhood was traumatic). While looking at this image of the caged inner child wanting love within shame-filled adult bodies, what parts of yourself can you begin to witness with curious, loving eyes?
As an activity before you embark on the 10 Week Inner Child Healing Journey, which starts 9/7/20, I encourage you to write down your answers in a healing journal:
What does your inner voice affirm as truths (when your mind is running on auto-pilot)?
Is your inner voice kind and loving, or is it angry and negative?
Are the words gentle and supportive or scary and harmful?
Were the actions you saw as a child harmful or traumatic?
Did you absorb much of the brunt for others' frustrations or childhood wounds?
Were you left alone to take care of yourself (and others), without healthy bonding and guidance?
What kind of trauma do you feel needs to be resolved within your being?
What parts of your being have been repressed since childhood?
As your subconscious is questioned through the power of memory, you will notice that a certain person or people are coming to the forefront of your mind. Please know that you are safe, and have the support you need now, to do the deeper work, that is essential for your health and happiness. If you are not in a safe environment, please let me know. Reparenting begins here, along with deeper layers of healing the mind, body and spirit....
Without realizing it, each human becomes WHO WE ARE through what we see and hear, repetitively. The reality is, most of you have been fighting for what you needed when you were younger. So it's up to you now, to reparent yourself, and become who you needed. No, it's not too late. You have this power.
It is said that your subconscious mind is 30,000 times more powerful than your conscious mind! Yes, your subconscious is a powerful force to be reckoned with, as it makes up around 95% of your brain power and handles everything your body needs to function properly. So, it's not hard to understand that you've subconsciously been living out and fighting for what your inner child has needed, as you have innate needs that were not met.
For those resonating with this article, your mind, body and/or spirit have in some way shape or form, been "beaten" into submission, of the purpose of conformity. The repression and rejection of these parts of your being have created your shadows, otherwise known as Inner Demons. The beautiful part about this is, you no longer have to coast miserably through life. You have the choice to change this, with the power of FREE WILL, and CHOICE. True freedom awaits, in the reprogramming of the subconscious. For most of you this awareness is nothing new, and for some of you, this is your moment of soulful recognition, that it's time for a change. AKA: "WAKE UP CALL!"
A human's upbringing dictates so much, up to a certain point. I used to believe that anyone with trauma, be it physical abuse, verbal abuse, neglect, abandonment, sexual abuse, emotional abuse, phycological invalidation, etc., could not fully heal, and that they would always have triggers come up throughout life. I now know that full healing is possible!
Childhood trauma is referred to in academic literature as Adverse Childhood Experiences. Children may go through a range of experiences that classify as psychological trauma, these might include neglect, abandonment, childhood sexual abuse and physical abuse, parent or sibling is treated violently or there is a parent with a mental illness. These events have profound psychological, physiological, and sociological impacts and can have negative, lasting effects on health and well-being. Kaiser Permanente and the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention's 1998 study on adverse childhood experiences determined that traumatic experiences during childhood are a root cause of many social, emotional, and cognitive impairments that lead to increased risk of unhealthy self-destructive behaviors, risk of violence or re-victimization, chronic health conditions, low life potential and premature mortality. As the number of adverse experiences increases, the risk of problems from childhood through adulthood also rises. Nearly 30 years of study following the initial study has confirmed this. Many states, health providers, and other groups now routinely screen parents and children for ACEs. Wikipedia
Per the CDC, Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACEs), are potentially traumatic events that occur in childhood (0-17 years). Examples include:
Experiencing violence, abuse, or neglect
Witnessing violence in the home or community
Having a family member attempt or die by suicide
Also included are aspects of the child’s environment that can undermine their sense of safety, stability, and bonding such as growing up in a household with:
Mental health problems
Instability due to parental separation or household members being in jail or prison
ACEs are linked to chronic health problems, mental illness, and substance misuse in adulthood. ACEs can also negatively impact education and job opportunities. However, ACEs can be prevented.
ACEs are very common. About 61% of adults surveyed across 25 states reported that they had experienced at least one type of ACE, and nearly 1 in 6 reported they had experienced four or more types of ACEs.
Preventing ACEs could potentially reduce a large number of health conditions. For example, up to 1.9 million cases of heart disease and 21 million cases of depression could have been potentially avoided by preventing ACEs.
Some children are at greater risk than others. Women and several racial/ethnic minority groups were at greater risk for having experienced 4 or more types of ACEs.
ACEs are costly. The economic and social costs to families, communities, and society totals hundreds of billions of dollars each year. Read more
***Please note - it does not make you weak to be acknowledging the parts of your being that need healing. This is the most courageous work, you or anyone you know, will ever do.*** I am here as your resolution and healing support system, as you do this inner child work.